those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
well you can't waste a boner
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
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She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
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Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
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