I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
dude. I can hear the air.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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