You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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