Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Well I just put wine in my tea
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
