ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
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