I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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