My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
They have beer where we have blood.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Randomize
