we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Randomize
