I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize