Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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