Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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