covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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