awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize
