Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Randomize
