I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
