my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.