Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
