That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
