Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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