When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
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He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
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I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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