Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
she peed on how many people?
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
PANTIES FOUND
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