Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I'm gonna have a badass scar
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
