but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA