Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Randomize
