Grow some girl-balls and come out already
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Of course I have a pirate flag
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize
