I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
