So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
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