If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
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