Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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