Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
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