She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I supernannyed him into submission
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
as a side note pls kill me
Randomize
