..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize