HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
