Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Randomize
