I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
