Whod you bang
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
