He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
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