Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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