I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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