I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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