I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
