return my video game
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Randomize
