____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Randomize
