I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
