She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
