He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
