I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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