Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
My bed smells like the plague
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
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