hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Randomize
