I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
